Monochrome

I did this for my Toastmasters Investiture, which is like a ceremony to honour the old ex-co and welcome the new ex-co. There was a chess theme, and we (the old ex-co) were told to wear black and white.

I LOVE it, because black and white are the colours of my cat. And I take colours very seriously.

Venom Claws

Yeah, claws again. Green this time, so that they look venomous. That's how I felt when I painted them. Toxic, dangerous to others. I sometimes think that that's why I wear bright colours, to warn people to stay away like frogs, snakes and insects do.

Isn't the colour pretty? It reflects gold. You can't really see it on my nails in these pictures but it shows up in the bottle. Maybe I shouldn't have used a black base. I'll try it on other colours.

And yes, I showed you my chipped polish. My fingernails are always painted but never perfect. What are you gonna do?

Cookie Monster

So, the hiatus has ended a little earlier than I predicted. I've got a new computer. And it's blue just like the cookie monster.

I love cookies. Just like the cookie monster. I wanted to paint a cookie on my ring finger, but I didn't have the right colours and didn't feel like getting my acrylic paint and mixing. So, all monsters.

And yes, the picture quality is bad and there's a big chip on my middle finger. I didn't manage to take a picture until about 5 days in. School, ya know.

Dark Side versus Bright Side

I know, I've been away too long. I've got a few designs accumulated which I haven't written about. I've been meaning to, but school work, sickness and indolence got in the way. I'll get to it this week, though. Hopefully.

We all have dark sides and bright sides. Side by side. This is how I expressed mine. Can you see how the dark side glows with tiny blue and purple glitter? And how the bright side is dulled by gray shimmer? Sometimes dark sides aren't very dark and bright sides aren't very bright.

And yeah, I messed up. There are dark spots on the bright side of my left middle finger. And my right pinkie is smudged. I can make up some philosophical crap that makes them tie in with the whole concept, but I won't. Just ignore them, okay. :)

Claws of Gold

Fingernails are protective gear, tools and weapons, all in one. I've been using them for decoration for years, so I haven't been using them as tools or weapons, in order to preserve the decoration.

It just occurred to me that it doesn't have to be one or the other. I can decorate my nails and then use them as tools or weapons. That's why I haven't cut them. They're so long now.

Isn't the gold just stunning? Well, in this picture it isn't as impressive as it should be, but imagine it more bright and sparkly. It's tiny gold glitter particles suspended densely in clear nail polish. Two coats makes it totally opaque. It looks like I have claws of gold.

Unlike gold, though, my nails aren't soft. They're hard and strong. Ideal to use as tools or weapons.

Sari Stripes

I saw a woman wearing a stripy sari in these colours and I couldn't stop looking at it. So of course, I had to put it on my nails. Pretty, isn't it? The colours are spot-on because I just happened to have them in my collection. I love my nail polish collection. 

And yes, the black lines are jagged. I used a thin brush which I'm not used to yet. Maybe I should have just used scotch tape. And if you think those lines are uneven, take a look at the nails of my right hand:

Oh, man. I need more practice.

And why am I holding an orange? I was about to eat it, and wanted to take a picture of my nails before I use them to tear away its skin. Loodie Loodie Loodie has a helpful tutorial teaching us how to peel an orange with a spoon, so as not to ruin nice nails, but I just can't be bothered to do all that. My nails are always protected with thick layers of top coat hard as glass, anyway. No orange peel can hurt my nail polish.

Back To Black

Yes, I've done it. I've painted my nails black. But don't worry, I'm not trying to repress any feelings. The absence of colour is just as significant as the presence of it.

So what does black signify? Rage. I've felt so much anger the past few days, and I didn't have any other way to express it. All I could do was paint my nails a thick, flat, powerful, unyielding black. That's the colour of my wrath.

But I didn't leave my nails just black, because my fury dissipated immediately. Which was what I was hoping for, actually. I felt so relieved that I didn't even bother taking a picture of my plain black nails for this blog. They looked so boring, you wouldn't want to see them, anyway.

As you have already seen, I added red glitter to my nails. Red is for desperation. That's the other thing I've been feeling lately. And all my life. It glows among all the dark thoughts.

I didn't file my nails to shape them before painting them. I didn't bother to cover my nails fully with polish or try to be neat near the cuticles. I slathered my top coat onto them sloppily and let the polish shrink and chip at the edges. I got them scuffed while scrubbing cats' dishes  at the SPCA. They look dull and damaged and disregarded, which is how I'm feeling right now.

The feeling is passing, though. Come back to see how I feel next.

Camouflage

Camouflage

My friend Danny is in National Service. It is such a waste of time. It's not as if the SAF will be able to defend anyone against anything if we're in war. It is probably the smallest army in the world. If we're in war, we will lose in about two minutes. All National Service does is make Singaporean men think that guns and fighting is all macho and cool, because they'll never be in war to be disillusioned.

I know my  nails don't look much like camouflage up close, but stand a little back from your computer and you won't even know they're there. Because they're camouflaged.

Okay, enough with the unfunny jokes. You get the point. I did my best with the colours I have. It looks nice from far away. War sucks. National service is pointless. The army is only good for its pretty camouflage pattern.

Yin and Yang

Yin Yang

The best philosophy ever. There's a complementary opposite to everything in life.

Whenever there's pain, there's a tiny dot of pleasure in it. When there's joy, there's a little bit of suffering in it. Happiness grows, and when it reaches its maximum, dissatisfaction begins. And the dissatisfaction grows, reaching maximum where it turns back into happiness. It's the circle of life. (Stop thinking about lion cubs.)

Many people I know are unhappy. And they try to be happy by trying to get rid of the unhappiness. Fools. That's not how happiness is found. Happiness is found inside the unhappiness. There's a little bit of happiness in misery, and in order to be able to see it, you have to embrace the misery and let it grow. Feel miserable. As the misery grows, so will the little seed of happiness inside it. And eventually the seed will become full-blown happiness with misery inside of it. And as happiness grows, of course the misery seed will grow too. It's a circle, like I said. It never ends.

I know yin and yang are supposed to be two fishes or tadpoles forming a circle, but I don't have the brush skills to paint circles or curvy lines on my nails. Thus, I drew almost straight lines. It still works, don't you think?

Bonus! Look what I got in the mail today. 

Rhinestones! I'm going to do awesome things with them. Anticipate! :D

bavani's colours

I've always found beauty in colours. It's what I love most about nature, and wildlife and all that. Bright flowers in green trees. Light from the sun captured in water in the sky, forming rainbows. Black stripes dark against the brilliant orange stripes of tigers. Iridescent wings of huge, scary black insects. Clear rain water mixing with sandy soil to make chocolate-brown mud. Shiny gray dolphins jumping out of deep blue seas. White-blue Husky eyes. The contrast of the pure white and stark black of my cat's fur, and the clear, sharp yellow of his eyes. The same colours on mynas - yellow beaks, black bodies and white wing tips. The thick, rich red of blood that rushes through all of us.

These things are why I love colours. Colours make me feel calm. That's why I always paint my nails. People think it's because I'm insecure about my naked nails, but no. It's to remind myself of things that make me happy. When something upsets me, I can look at my nails and feel composed. When I look at my nails, there's nothing but my cat's eyes or a flower in a tree or the blood that's pumped through my lungs. Everything else fades. Nothing can make me unhappy when my heart still pumps blood and flowers still bloom and my cat still looks at me with love. I don't paint my nails to hide myself from the world. I do it to hide the upsetting things in the world from myself. The more troubled I am, the more colours I put on my nails.

I feel in colours too. I don't know it when I'm feeling them, but when I think back about times when I experienced strong emotions, everything's tinted a certain colour. Every emotion in every situation has a unique colour. Painting that colour on my nails or my eyelids is a way of releasing the emotion.

I hope you didn't expect this blog to be light-hearted fun, with manicures and makeup tips. Nothing about me is light-hearted. My heart is very heavy.

Here are some of my best expressions:

 Black Cat With Yellow Eyes

 White Cat With Blue Eyes

 Day And Night

 Patriotism

 Orange Juice, Blueberries And Chocolate

 Rainy Sky Over Trees

 Melted M&Ms

 Bird Park

 Warm Side Of The Rainbow

 Mad Hatter

 Citrus

 Chinese New Year! One of my favourites.

 Claws

Empty Blue Sky

Look forward to a lot more pictures.